i am a naturally happy — easily excited person. this picture of me? that’s how i’ll probably seem like with my good friends. crazy, always laughing, always enthusiastic over the smallest things — or joyful when i find out awesome things. or just when i see a cute panda .gif …and i actually do jump a lot when i’m happy. like, a lot.
but that’s not all today is all about. this is a blog dedicated to breaking facades. here it goes:
yes, i am full of that joy 99.9% of the time.
i absolutely LOVE being happy & being gifted w/the ability to bring joy to others.
but there is a .01% where i am down, when life hits me like a ton of bricks …
when i feel weak, when the world is a rough broken place and it feels so hopeless,
when i am frustrated with the people i love the most & i don’t know how to express my true feelings to them
when i’m tired & it’s just SO HARD to be nice
when i’m tired of saying ‘yes’ and i rather just hide away in my apartment and apply to be a permanent hermit
there is a point where i realize, “no symphony you do not have an overflowing abundant fountain of joy. sorry girrrl, you’re only human!”
so, i erase all of that.
i let my joy come from the overflowing love of Christ.
i let Him sustain me, complete me.
i let myself bask in the never-ending mercies & His grace
i die to myself so He could transform me
through all this, i have joy.
For his anger lasts only a moment, but his favor lasts a lifetime; weeping may remain for a night, but rejoicing comes in the morning.
psalms 30:5 (niv)